Salt and Pepper

The salt and pepper were missing from the table

I looked all around for them

But I wasn’t able

To find them – such a little thing…

Salt and pepper – you need both

When you ask someone to pass the salt, you mean the pepper too,

When either is gone from the table it just isn’t right

When both aren’t in sight – it just isn’t right

You always expect them both to be there - you don’t even think about it.

Such a little thing, like everything

Swirling around in my mind right now

Mixing words and thoughts up

Like the tossed salad I was trying to make

Like the cake I tried to bake

Like the gifts I tried to buy

Like the joke I heard that made me cry

 

And I looked for a pair of socks, but both were missing

And I looked for two candles to light

But they were nowhere in sight

And two beloved toys when I was small

They were gone and that’s all – that’s all…

 

And two people I loved dearly I cannot find

And the tears in my eyes make me blind

And I still can’t find the salt and pepper

And I still can’t find the two candles or toys

And I still can’t find the two socks

Or two locks - two locks to lock up the doors

And keep the memories from flooding into the overwhelming emptiness I feel

As I panic and reel because I can’t do anything about anything

Even though I want to help so badly

 

Salt and pepper, two socks, two candles, two beloved toys

Two beloved people - a best friend, and my beloved sister,

Both gone – and I didn’t even get to say goodbye…

 

And while the rest of the world rushes around, going on its way into another year

I look for the salt and pepper

And try to do simple things that aren’t simple anymore….

 

I can’t help anything, I don’t have any answers, and I can’t make anything better,

I can’t even find the salt and pepper.

 

When both are gone it just isn’t right

It just isn’t right…

 

In memory of Stephanie Marsh and Nadia Barghelame

 

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Poem for the families and friends of Nadia Bargelame and Stephanie Marsh

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Nadia Barghelame

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Blue Ballerina” was written for those who have lost someone because of a crime.